STOPPING STRIFE IN THE HOME.

Does your family seem to be locked in a cycle of strife? Maybe clashes have become more frequent and more intense. Perhaps you do not know how the disagreement started.Yet you love one another and you do not want to hurt one another. It is important to remember that difference in opinion does not necessarily mean that your family life is disintegrating. It is not the disagreement itself but how you handle your disagreement can determine how tranquil or hostile your home will be. Consider some steps that may help to eliminate the strife.

(1) STOP RETALIATING

It is a normal thing for arguments to occur sometimes, but when one begins listening instead of speaking, a heated exchange may start to cool down. Therefore, resist the urge to retaliate when provoked. Maintain your own self-respect and dignity by controlling yourself. Remember, peace in the family is more important than winning arguments.

(2). ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR FAMILY MEMBER'S
FEELINGS.

Remember that active emphatic listening without interrupting or prejudice can do more to quell anger and restore peace. Instead of imputing bad motive, acknowledge the other person's feelings. Do not attribute to malice which may be caused by imperfection. Hurtful speech may be more the product of thoughtlessness or a wounded heart than mean vengeful spirit.

(3). KEEP YOUR VOLUME AND YOUR TONES DOWN.

One family member's impatience can easily raise another's anger. Resist the urge to be sarcastic or insulting or to raise your voice, no matter how offended you may feel.

Avoid hurtful accusations, such as " you don't care about me" or " you never listen". Rather,tell your spouse in a calm manner how his or her conduct has affected you. For instance: (" I feel hurt when you..."). Shoving, slapping,kicking,or any other form of violence is never excusable.

The same is true of name-calling, contemptuous comments, or threat. I think the aforementioned points are necessary in order to reduce, or if possible put an end to broken homes which has become a part of the present day society. It is very regrettable that some parents do not think about the bad effects or psychological damage that this extemporaneous actions may lead to. The fact remains that there are no two persons that are perfect, but spouses should try to tolerate each other some times in order to reduce broken homes in our society.